Monday, October 26, 2015

Sunday Dinners - Six Years Later



This blog started with one idea on July 5, 2009, create at least one year of Sunday dinners. six years later, some things have changed, the usual guests remain but we have added, subtracted, switched out. Sunday dinner used to always be at our house because my parents moved to a smaller house. My mother in law stopped driving, so we would pick her up. Then it came to the point where she couldn't take care of herself so we started moving in with her at the same time that I took a job in Honolulu again, now at UH West O'ahu and not a one-year stint either, but a tenure-track position in a building program.  Two of the three boys got married and moved to Oahu too so there are 5 of us for Sunday dinner on O'ahu and 5-7 of them for Sunday dinner in Hilo depending if I'm in Hilo or Honolulu for Sunday dinner.

The picture at the top is our Sunday dinner at Buca di Beppo for my daughter-in-law Pomai's birthday. It was fall break, so boy 3, now a senior in high school came to Honolulu to hang out. In both locations, 3 "families"take turns "cooking." My mother in law does not cook anymore either, she is almost immobile, so we either go out on her turn or Ken or I cooks. Whenever I go home, I try to cook. On Oahu, the 2 boys and I take turns so I make sure I am home to cook and I don't go back to Hilo on my turn. 

Dinner is still at 6. Dessert is still not optional. For Ken, pupus are not optional, but the kids and my mom don't seem to need this or spend time worrying about pupu, and the kids are not always dessert people either, but they are still in training. 

What happens when we do this for 6 years rather than the 1 I was trying for?

Our adult children, our daughters-in-law and hopefully soon our new grandchildren who can actually stay for Sunday dinner feel like this is just what we do as a family. It is our one day a week to sit down together. It has become a part of our culture and a part of our genealogy. My mother often asks, shall we stop Sunday dinner? 

No. For a long time, that was the only socialization my mother in law was getting. If we don't hold on to Sunday dinner, we will drift away and we won't even notice until it's too late. 

I think we will eventually end this because people will have not enough time, too much distance, too much chaos, too much kuleana, but for these six years and for as many years as we can swing it, we will hold on. I may not be blogging because I am not going to make something new every week, but we are still here.

Blessing on you and your 'ohana. #sundaydinnercrew

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